G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra

[Rob]

Like most movies that have 6 different people involved in creating it (3 for the screenplay, 3 for the "story" and one for the comic although one dude made the screenplay and got credit for the story) this movie is rife with plot holes and inconsistencies.

There are serious problems with the motivations of some of the characters and once again, like the Transformers, the good guys hold back almost every time, allowing the bad guys to run roughshod over them.

At no time did I think this movie was in any way plausible and I had to completely disable my bullshit meter because after the first 5 minutes it was already on overload.

The special effects were in some places impressive (the accelerator suits come to mind) and in other places not so much. Actually most places not so much. They had a real problem blending the effects in this movie and the sense that things were "fake" was an ever present companion for me during this film.

I have to just sort of smile and chuckle as I find myself longing for the days of "The Rock" or "Independence Day": movies that were considered long on effects and short on plot in their time. At least back then they were trying. There used to be a saying that "if there is a gun on the table in act one it must go off in act 3" in storytelling. Nowadays it's more like "if there's a gun on the table in act one it must go off every 40 seconds or we will lose the audience."

All of that said: this is fairly standard "Summer Blockbuster" fare. If you can shut your brain off and enjoyed any of the other big movies this summer (Terminator, Transformers) you will probably like GI Joe just fine. It's essentially the same movie so you might want to save yourself a few bucks and just think about the ones you already saw but that's up to you.

GI Joe does a few things better than the second Transformers movie. The acting is much better and there is a significant decrease in silly one liners. It also does a few things worse, the blending of effects I mentioned for instance.

Overall it's not terrible. And I really wish someone would give Dennis Quaid a decent job. But I can't recommend it any more than I recommended "Terminator: Salvation" or "Transformers."

It would make a fine Netflix rental.